R the Bigoted, Gay, Anti-Abortion Rights Ex-Roomie

In 1984, I somehow ended up with this yutz R as my room mate my freshman year at Champaign-Urbana.  Thinking about the  comfy house that I now share with Wifey and the Creature makes me marvel that I lived in a single, prison-cell sized room with this despicable, odious specimen for an entire school year.

When he talked with his friends back home on the phone (pre cell-phone days), he referred to “The niggers” all the time. He suppressed his Jew-Hating when I was around, but then he referred to Illini Tower as “Kike’s Peak,” in front of my tough, Jewish bud Mike, who straightened him out. He frequently told bigoted jokes to people in the dorm bathroom, and was perplexed when all he got was a deafening silence instead of a hearty laugh.  This was long before people talked about what is PC on campuses.  He just wasn’t funny.

He would eventually become the chief goon in charge of the anti abortion rights creeps at school.  He came back from the annual meeting of those  uptight, soon-to-be theocrats with literature that made a literal comparison of abortion to the Holocaust.  Egad. What a nightmare.

AND, he was as gay as you could get.  Rumors went around for a while about him, but I didn’t believe them.  I did not then realize just how contradictory and flakey people could truly be. The closet that he was in was so dark and deep, I doubt that even now, 3o years later, that he has come out to his parents.

In any event, I did eventually confirm his sexual orientation. (shrug)  By this time I had already been friends with K, Urbana’s Professional Lesbian, and had taken my girlfriend to Chester Street, the gay bar in town.  I felt sorry for him, to some extent, because he was unattractive, overweight, gauche, boring, and anything BUT fabulous, so he was going to have some trouble even fitting in with the gay people I knew.

He now seems to be  a perfect, foolish archetype of the Trump voter.  I am sure he voted for The Hairpiece, despite the fact that Trump is anti-Gay, and despite the fact that Trump’s pro-life stance is newly-acquired and clearly self-serving.  He and similar folk have minds like gears, as Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. said.   In his case, Trump’s stances on abortion and homosexuality are missing teeth in the gear.  Their minds seem to work just fine until we come to the places where the teeth are missing.

The self-righteous Christians who deafen us with their sanctimony:  clearly missing teeth when they voted for the genital-grabbing, avaricious, profane, multi-divorcee.  The American Legionnaires and VFW members who insist that anyone who served overseas must be a hero incapable of committing atrocities:  clearly missing teeth when they voted for a draft dodger who insulted two unquestionably heroic servicemen.


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